As I had mentioned, I already had set up an appointment with a Gynecologist to have myself checked. Again, once the gynecologist saw my previous pregnancy records and my young age (28), she suggested everything was probably fine. Just in case, she ordered some Hormone blood tests. Most people know it as Day 3 testing. When my results came out I had an FSH of 10!!
10 people as in the double digit number TEN – at age 28!!!
I can never forget the letter I received in the mail noting the FSH of 10 along with the comment – Ovarian Reserve may be slightly low. That was my death sentence. Just like a “Guilty” verdict from the jury, I was deemed infertile. The ultimate and defining reality of my life.
I’m not sure how that reserve works but until now – almost 2 years after the test and atleast 2 and a half years after vigorously trying month after month – NOTHING has worked out!
Did I mention – I never used any birth control – EVER!!! Other than maybe timing and withdrawl!!
I had never felt so disappointed in myself and in my body. Being almost 10 years younger than my husband, I was the one with a fertility problem.
And it’s not something that I can control. It’s not even my fault that I was amongst probably the 1 % of women who suffer from Premature Ovarian Aging in their twenties! I sure as hell didn’t factor that into my life plan. Neither did a breast cancer patient in her early thirties or a brain tumor patient in their twenties. But it happens. Shit happens and you have to deal with it! That’s life – if it doesn’t kill you, it only makes you stronger.
Anyway, as soon as I received the results, I got my game face on – ready to battle infertility in the face and set up an appointment with my RE in January 2015. During the month of December 2014 I ordered my first ovulation strips online. On cycle day 14, I got a positive sign for my LH surge. We tried to conceive during my fertile window. And baam – 12 days later, I had my period!
I seriously didn’t understand what could have gone wrong. Only to find out that there are an infinite amount of things that can go wrong.
I met an RE close to our house in January 2015. She seemed like a nice lady and spent a good hour with me and my husband. She assured us that I was young (only 28 at the time) and I had conceived my son naturally and carried him to term so it should hopefully happen again regardless of the borderline high FSH of 10.
She ordered some basic tests including AMH and an HSG – a test in which a dye is passed through your tubes to check if there is any blockage preventing fertilization from occurring. The AMH came out at 3.1 ng/ml which was reassuring. I was due to go in February 2015 for my HSG. As scared as I was for of this test, I went in and got it done. The test came out clear. Little did I know that this was one of the first procedures I would have to go through as part of our ongoing efforts to conceive our second child.
And so began the real and seemingly unending trouble. The doctors visits, the rounds of blood tests, ultrasounds, medications – oral, vaginal, intra muscular, subcutaneous – you name it, the treatment cycles and all the ups and downs that go in between